Those of you who know me are aware that I’m always ready to see the best in my fellow humans. This experience of being human can be hard, and people get wounded along the way. We’re all a mixed bag of delightful and dysfunctional. Its part of what makes us each unique – our individual paths leave imprints: the same childhood situation can make one person whimsical and another depressed. That quote is really true:It’s not what happens to us as much as it is how we react to what happens to us.
So, of course, we’re all unique. As for me, I love the creative process, and what I really want is to create together with others who are on somewhat similar vibration. There’s nothing like the sense of oneness and flow and magick when playing with others in a similar energy! And there’s nothing more draining than doing music without that similar vibe.
And when it comes to intimate relationships, including the intimacy of playing music together, I’ve finally realized that overlooking dysfunction and excusing people’s unwillingness to address their issues is counterproductive. You can love and appreciate people without letting them into your personal space. Sort of like “Hmm, I wouldn’t deny that experience to the Universal mind, but I don’t choose to be part of it.”
That means if a musician is wrapped up and trapped in ego, or can’t get beyond drama, or is attached to negativity, anger, or addiction, I’m just not wanting to be so close anymore. I mean, these are issues I deal with when I counsel people – the huge and wonderful difference is that people wanting counseling are ready to let themselves evolve. But for those who choose to wallow, I’m taking a step back.
Sooo, that being said, Psychanaut will, at least for the time being, be much more fluid a project. I still dream of a band of conscious creatives and a level of understanding that comes when that happens. It’s awesome. And I don’t choose to be wedded to people without vision, nor do I really want to be very close to those who are not at least minimally self-aware. So we’ll probably play with a revolving cast of musicians, sometimes more, sometimes less, rather than having set players. There’s no reason we have to follow any rigid rules. We may not release any recordings or play live very much for awhile, or we may do it in spurts… I’m wanting to throw all expectations out the window for now. That was the life lesson I got from Big Love. Always follow your heart, and don’t settle for less. And I’m embracing the freedom.
Here’s to creative freedom, enjoying life, and smelling the preverbial roses.